Unlearn

Sunlight through my windows on grey wall. By Sunniva Strauman.

unlearn
what you thought was right and true
what is truth
what’s the use
of making all this noise

become the silent voice
the silent void
is Truth
in its essence
it is all one, presence
there is no eye
in the apple

does this mean we can’t be
does this mean we can’t be that family
we so wanted to be

have you realised
that what you asked of me
from the beginning
was to let go
of you, and that us
we had created in our minds
to let go of our attachment, our fear
in order to fully trust

maybe someday
when lessons are learnt
challenges conquered
all we are left with is the loving source
of what we had and still have and can still have or could have had, depends
on God’s will
it will or would have when and if it will
if there is even anything to ‘have’

I feel the call
I leave it all
up to the heavens
as I ground my being
inbetween, in the middle
into stillness

into my calling
stripping it down
layer by layer
leaf by leaf
petal by petal

this human you are so human
I take you down from the pedestal
I made for you
with my tears
out of love, but out of fear
of not being enough

for you to sit on your throne
and decide for me with your index finger
because I was lost or I thought I was
you did as I pleased

my little strands of hair
weaved into the image
of lack

you felt like gold
bitter cold sweet
drops of heaven
too precious for me to hold
and cherish
I could not

hold your burning flesh
with my tender skin
felt like hell’s burden was my karma

you are no longer here
yet you are
always
here
we are
so free
you and me
are not
who we thought

but who we feel
as presence, essence
of oneness
no loneliness
no helplessness
no hopelessness
only grace

amaze me
with your wild calm
patience

– Solstrauman

Armour


ARMOUR

you didn’t get the best of me
you got the worst
tested first
then I let you go

you didn’t get to see the one
you belong with
so good, so strong – the one
you knew I could be the one

the one
you knew I could be
all along

I am good for you
you are good for me
we are good together
so much for stormy weather

it is written
in the stars
in our hearts

you know it’s true
as well as I do

we are one
we belong
together
forever

we can get through any storm
we transcend, any shape, any form
all that truly matters is our love
ascending the heavens above

I can see it in your eyes (tell no lies)
divine beauty in the skies (in disguise)

my love, you don’t need that heavy armour
mon amour, you don’t need that heavy armour
anymore

〜 August 2021, song lyrics by Sunniva Strauman

Photos by Sunniva Strauman.

Jewelry by Juhls, given to me by جدي, my grandfather, and أُمي, my mother. Sami symbols of the sun wheel and bird feet.

– Sólstrauman

كوب شاي

Det er når eg sit med den langsame koppen med varmvatn og lime at eg kjenner det.
At livet er godt, og der er så uendeleg mange ting å vera takksam for.

Varmt limevatn. Eller te.
Chai. Ein kopp med ener:chi. كوب شاي.

Rykandes varm. Dampen dansar seg oppover frå vatnoverflata.

Aromaterapi fyrt opp av teljos gjer meg godt.
Bruker luktesansen til å la det gode ved eukalyptus, peppermynte og lavendel
få bu i meg, ta bustad i meg. Boosta meg?

Lufta er fylt av røykelse, Paulo santo.
Rensar, balanserer.

Pustar djupt inn, og ut.
Finn balanse i pusten.
Kjenner at lungene strekk seg litt meir, utover,
enn det dei vanlegvis gjer.

Ser på ljoset framfor meg.
Eit enkelt teljos.

Eg trenger ikkje meir.
Eg har alt eg trenger.
Eg har meir enn nok.

Det varmar sjela mi frå innsida å sjå inn i flamma,
og koma i kontakt med meg sjølv.
Med mitt indre.
Mi indre flamme.

Eg let meg rettleia av sola inni meg.
Solar pleksus ljoser opp stien,
så eg ser kor eg skal trå for å koma meg framover.
Steg for steg.

Eg trenger ikkje gå i ring meir.
Eg omfamnar det dunkle, og finn vegen heim, samstundes.
I sameining, med det store, uforklarlege.

Full av tillit. Til universet.

.

Photos by Sunniva Strauman.

– Sólstrauman